The MikeoJulia War
by Edge of De Wall
Summary: This is a story about how a Sax and a Trombone didn't get along. Based on true people at John Handley High.
1. The Prologue: The Funky Chicken

The Mikeo-Julia War

By Edge of De Wall

This story is fictious and in anyway doesn't reflect the real Mikeo-Julia War, which is still going on sadly... 

Prolouge

The Funky Chicken

Yes, I know what you are thinking; how can a dance start a war? Well, it's simple my dear. Yes, very simple. 

It all started on a beautiful day, such as today if it is what you call beautiful day. If not, check your weather outside, for you just sit indoors anyway. This beautiful day could be...

*Random people* GET ON WITH IT!!!

Oh.. um.. anyway, back to story.

The day was normal, until came on Julia's brain.

Now, Julia, she was a sophomore trombone player who recently moved to John Handley High School. She is defiantly a Mary-Sue. No, I'm serious she is. She's me. Anyway. She is skinny, short, and has short blonde hair. She dresses like a boy and she fairly close to one too, a little one at least. With boobs.

Anyway, Julia the sophomore came in the band room humming the tune by Siam Shade called _CUM WITH ME._ She then started to dance the Funky Chicken. Just then, her arch enemy came in...

Michael the sax player!

Now, Mikey was sophomore who had many nicknames. Mandark is one of them, as well as Mikey. He tends to hate being called Harry Potter though, even though he looks like James Potter, expect shorter and skinner than a stick bug. 

He and Julia don't get along....

He stared at her....gawking his "What-The-Fuck" gawk.

Julia happened to turn around and stepped on his foot.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!"

"Oppss.. sor.. wait its you," Julia said, turning around realizing who it was.

And from then on, came resentment.


	2. Chapter One: The Frist Fight Dubbed PAAS...

Chapter One:

The First Fight Dubbed "PAASTA!"

After the Funky Chicken incident, in fact, right after the Funky Chicken incident came the first fight.

"Why the fuck did you do that?!" Mikey shouted, holding his toe in pain.

"Am I not allow to dance mother fo!" Julia shouted in her hipster voice.

"Oh, you are sooo going to get it.."

"Get what?"

"Oyooyoyoyoyooyooyooyoyoyoyooooyyooo" Michael started to say.

"Oh, don't start dat shit!" 

"PAASTA!" Mikey said

"PAASTA!" Julia replayed

"PAASTA!" Mikey said.

"PAASTA!" Julia replayed.

"PAASTA!" Mikey finally retorted.

"Okay, you win this round bitch, but I'll get you next time!" Julia said, leaving with a "hmph!"


	3. Chapter Two: The Funny Position

Chapter Two:

The Funny Position

(Okay, I admit, the last chapter made NO SENSE, but this one will..)

Nobody knew how this battle began. All they knew it was a typical afternoon at Handley High School. 

"Julia, will you shut the fuck up?!"

Julia silenced. Not in obedience, but in anger. How dare _HE _say that to her after she was having a crappy day. She raised her head and walked over to the lanky boy. Cold gray met with dark brown as she looked at him in the eye, face to face, deeply breathing and teeth clinched. 

"Since when do I ever talk to you, Mr. I-Can't-Shut-My-Mouth!" She shouted in her high pitched normal voice.

Mikey gave his "What-the-fuck-you-do-that-all-the-time" gawk (Same as the "WTF" Gawk.) and replayed "You better not touch me!"

"What makes you think I'll touch you, bitch!" Julia screamed.

"Maybe if you didn't clinch your fits like you're about to hit me, I wouldn't say that," he calmly pointed out.

She was just about to knee him when some one, a female, spoke.

"Whoa. The daily Julia and Michael fight is getting intense,"

They both turned around an saw a short red-haired trumpet player by the name of Emily. Emily loved to see those two fight. Well, you don't blame her. Seeing two incurably skinny and weak people try to slug it out is pretty funny. 

"Well, go on. Continue. Don't want to keep the people reading this waiting!" Emily pointed out.

"What made us freeze like this?" Michael asked.

"I don't know.. Maybe the author.." Julia was saying, but was interrupted.

"Who asked you?" Michael asked.

"Well, you did!"

"Oh, will you shut UP!!" Mikey went into a high pitch yelp at the end of his statement. His face contorted with pain and he fell to the ground, grabbing his crotch.

Julia had kneed him.

(Author's Warning: The following will sound like a rape scene, when it isn't.)

She the knelled down and try to turn him on his back, but he grabbed both of her wrists and forced her down on her back, hard.

Julia landed on her back on the hard floor. She let out a tiny scream as the wind was knocked out of her. Disparately breathing to try to get her air back, she noticed she had another problem. Michael was on top of her, still holding her down.

(Author's Note: Funny, how _Love Vampire _is playing while I'm writing this scene. *sings*I want you to restrict me..)

He then sat down on her, to prevent her from getting up, took his hands off her wrists, and leaned forward. He put his hands on her neck like he was going to choke her. He was about to too but he was (thankfully) interrupted by Emily.

"Whoa. Michael, get a room with Julia..."

Both fighters where confused, but then quickly realized the horror she spoke of.

Julia was lying down on the floor, Mikey on top of her. If that was a compromising position, then what is it?!

They quickly looked at each other in disgust (though secretly they both wanted the other to be naked. j/k! I don't even want to imagine Mikey Jacobs naked....*pukes* urg....um.. back to the story as soon as I was my eyes out with sulfuric acid...) and Michael quickly got off of Julia.

As Julia left that day, there was two things on her mind 1) Was he going to choke me? and 2) Was he going to rape me? She gave the second thought a shudder and left, knowing this battle wasn't over. Tomorrow, she will be in the clairnet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wahoo!! I finally started this bitch! And I'm going to finish it too! :P


	4. Chapter 3: Light saber with a Clarinet a...

Chapter 3: Light saber with a Clarinet and a Soprano Sax Part One: No! Marionette   
  
Disclaimer: The song No! Marionette is by Siam Shade. It is a Japanese song that I have little idea about the translation, but it happens to be the song that I was listening to when I was writing this. So what did I do, I TRANSLATED IT!!! Wahoo! My first translation. That's why it took longer for this chapter to come out. And it as you will see, I'm not the best translator in the world! Yeee-ha!!! Okay, enough with that. On with the fan fic. Um.. translator's note: if you see a ??? that means I have not found the word yet. If you can help me, I would love it! Especially if you already have all the songs on Siam Shade III and Siam Shade IV:Zero translated! ^_^ Please...   
  
********************************************************************************   
  
The fighting began in an evening Jazz Band practice. Julia happened to bring her clarinet, and for good reason too. She put up her bass trombone and walk up to Mikey with her clarinet drawn.   
  
_ YOU ARE THE SHED! _  
  
  
Michael sensed her and drew his Soprano Sax out,light saber noises started to sound. Everyone turned to see what was going on.   
  
_Is it so? Somewhat listen end angel.  
DESPERATELY, for recently selfish reasons don't matter, just say it. Those guys whenever scaning.  
I request time on the intimacy face exchange.  
I use a pure guess; purify the telagram in the slender ringhousing of help.  
Therefore cry nineteen ninety-eight living to shine.  
This time's bad times (fxxk out!)_  
  
  
"The first time we fought I was but a learner," Julia said, "But now I am the master."  
  
"Only a master of evil, Julia," Michael said coolly.  
  
And the battle began.   
  
  
_From the beginning abide help. Annihilation agreement of the last effort.  
Painful confusion on the place tiding over of words in deception continue.  
Faithless man  
Only to leave an excorcism(?) fee on the passenger train(?) to become an evil thorn(?)   
Real bureaucracy of a typical counrty by means; to oppose the sturdy bracelet*(the furigana says "BURESURETTO" but the kanji reads "Hand Tin Plate")_  
  
  
(AN: What we are about to do is something that we can't do due to the fact both Mandark and I as soooo clumsy. [He's the clumsiest person on Earth and I'm second clumsiest person on Earth.] If you go the Handley and know us, then you'll really laugh... mainly if you where in my gym class. Fell on my butt jump roping along with other things.)  
  
  
They fought, as their um.. instruments; light saber things clashed together. Julia stuck a blow, but Michael blocked it. Michael held his sax above his head and charged at Julia, attacking her head. She block, before lifting her hand and using the force to push Michael back. Julia flipped in the air and landed on a chair, twirling her clarinet around like a baton before holding it in the ready position.   
  
Michael advanced towards her, jumping a flip in the air over her head, and landed on the chair behind her.  
  
  
_ Stop grieving sky. Rainfall to divide rain in how to dance. dancing in the rain  
  
Endlessly soon imitate doubt to put out. Lost my heart   
Only to repeat, endless sigh.  
This occasionally Well! close my light. The moon hides.  
Forget-me-not end. The hot look.   
Caught this heart. In that breast._  
  
  
Julia jumped back as Michael swung his sax, but her face was hit, and a blood came dripping down the cut on her cheek.   
  
  
She stoked two fingers down the blood on her cheek and looked at it. _Blood. Blood. HOW DARE HE!_   
  
  
"HOW DARE YOU CUT MY FACE, BITCH!!!!!!" She shouted, and ran towards him, kicking him on the ground.  
  
  
_ Change grieving sky  
Large Drops of Rain wet hands on how to dance dancing in the rain_  
  
  
Michael fell on his back, dropping his sax. He looked up and quickly rolled over as Julia jumped towards him with her clarinet striking down.   
  
Julia got up, and charged towards Michael. Michael the stretched his hand out and used the force to bring his sax back to his hand. He blocked her just in time.   
Julia jumped back after being blocked, and Michael ran towards her.   
  
The battle continued.  
  
  
_Losing my bearings, leave it as it is. Start running go my way entirely part with mourning.  
Sunset glow dye on glass case of the inside.  
This voice is little but report tactics shouting  
Breaking of Marionete..._  
  
  
Michael disabled Julia and kicked her to the ground. He was charging for the kill when she picked up her clarinet and blocked it.  
  
They battled each others strength, trying to over power the other, when the band door opened.   
  
_ This time's bad times (Break this time) No! Marionette_  
  
  
"What are you two doing?!" the band director asked, looking at them strangely. They stopped. Julia sat up. She looked around to see everyone was probably enjoying it, considering they had popcorn and where sitting down.  
  
They both hid their instruments behind their backs.   
  
"Nothing Mr. Harrison!" they both said in unison.  
  
Mr. Harrison looked at them once more, shrugged, and left.  
  
Julia got up and looked at Michael.   
  
"Mandark, we're having a rematch soon," she said.   
  
"Agreed," Michael said putting up his instrument.  
  
As Michael Jacobs left the band room, he heard Julia say to him:  
  
"Another time Mandark. Another time."  
  
  
_This time's bad times (So you're the shed) Break! Marionette_  
  
*****************************************************************************   
Phew! Go me on the translation!!! Though some of it is probably wrong.. oh well. *shurgs* I'm not sure how many more chapters, but it'll probably be finished soon. Chapter 5 will be up soon! :D   
  
PEACE! EDGE OUT! ^_^V Next chapter will be up after I'm done translating Destination Truth! It's actually an important chapter, so I'll hurry up the transaltion. 


	5. Chapter 4: How Mikey came to hate Julia:...

Chapter 4: How Mikey came to hate Julia: The Sax named Fluffy.  
  
Yay! Chapter 4. Chapter 5 is underway of completion and actually came before Chapter 4. This is confusing.  
  
Anyway, here's a summery of what has happened so far:  
Julia accidentally steps of Mikey's foot while singing (Prologue) which cause a big fight (Chapter 1). The author was high on crack when writing chapter 1 and apologizes for the stupid chapter. A big fight broke between them after school, which ended with them in a compromising position (Chapter 2). The next big fight was during an evening Jazz Band rehearsal with a clarinet and a soprano sax. It ended in a stalemate with another matching coming soon (Chapter 3).  
  
Disclaimer thingy: this is how Michael Jacobs came to hate Julia. Of course, this like the rest of the story is fictional. Especially this. I don't really know if he named his sax Fluffy, and I never did what I'm going to do to it.. just read the story!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
This is how it all began.  
  
  
Once upon a time their where two lovers. Their names where Noko and Nako. They where married and they where happy, even though they where poor. They had 12 kids, all which where very happy.  
  
Noko was not actually handsome, especially compared to his beautiful wife Nako, but she loved him so dearly. And Noko in returned loved her.   
  
When Nako was young, she was the most beautiful girl in the city. Everyone wanted to marry her, but she came across Noko on the streets and feel in love. Must to her parent's dismay, she abandoned her boisquise (AN: I can't spell, so sue me!) life to live as a peasant with Noko.  
  
The kids had only one toy, a stuff dog. The dog's name was Fluffy. It was the only one they could afford, and it was old and ragged.  
  
One day, while the younger kids where playing in the streets near the factory where the older children, Nako, and Noko worked, a cart came by and ran over Fluffy. Crushing it, destroying the only toy the children had.  
  
The children looked at the crush toy and screamed in tears for their mother.  
  
Nako came rushing out the factory to meet her children. The work over the years has aged her; she looked tried and weary. Nobody could recognize her as Nako, the lovely lady she was before.  
  
"What's the matter children?" She asked them, in a calm voice.  
  
"Fluffy! Fluffy!" Her children cried.  
  
Nako looked down on the road to see Fluffy in shambles.   
  
Just then, Noko ran out, along with the rest of the children. "What's wrong honey?" Noko asked, hugging his wife and small kids.  
  
"It's Fluffy!" Nako cried, pointing to the stuff animal.  
  
Just then, as the family was crying, they all fell over, dead. They where all shot by the factory owner who didn't like slackers.  
  
So they lied on the ground, the entire family. Noko and Nako, however, did not cling together.  
  
  
Several Years Later... In fact, probably 200 years later.  
  
Nako was reincarnated as Julia, and Noko was reincarnated into Michael. Due to the fact that Noko and Nako where apart when they died, they would meet later in their lives, and if something happened between them, they would hate each other.   
  
And Mikey named his saxophone Fluffy.  
  
One day, Julia Smith met Michael Jacobs. They seemed to have gotten along and became good friends.   
  
They would have probably gone out and gotten married like their past selves but something happened.  
  
Julia stepped on and broke Fluffy.  
  
"Opps. Sorry Mikey!" She said.  
  
Mikey looked down at the broken instrument and cried. His Fluffy, his precious Fluffy was dead, will it needed to be repaired.  
  
"FLUFFY! YOU KILLED FLUFFY!!" he screamed loudly.  
  
"Fluffy? YOU NAMED YOUR SAX FLUFFY?!" she retorted in disbelieve.  
  
"I HATE YOU FOR KILLING FLUFFY!!!! FLUFFY WAS THE ONLY THING I EVER LOVED!!!!! I EVEN RODE IT!! SHE WAS DEAR TO ME!!! HOW DARE YOU KILL MY FLUFFY!!!" Mikey cried and ran out the room, holding Fluffy close to him.   
  
Julia looked disgusted at the new information about Michael.  
  
And from then on, even though it tortured their souls, they hated each other. Mikey hated Julia for killing Fluffy (even though it got repaired...) and Julia hated Mikey for naming his sax Fluffy and loving it.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Instering chapter no? Well, I decided to do a romance/sap/angst/comedy chapter thing. Besides it fits in with the next chapter which is the peace talks!! :D YAY!!  
  
Well, better get started on the translations.. oy.  
  
Peace, Love, and Fluffy the Sax-  
  
Edge 


	6. Chapter 5: Peace Talks Offered: Destinat...

  
Chapter 5: Peace Talks Offered:Destination Truth  
  
Disclaimer: Destination Truth is a song by Siam Shade. I happened to listen this while starting to write this chapter late at night before Jazz Band due to the fact that I couldn't sleep.  
This translates to the characters. ^_^  
EDGE:Share my insomnia!!  
M+J: NOOOO!! WE WANT TO SLEEP!!  
EDGE: Too bad for you then!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!  
I also don't believe in past lives, I just had it in so there would be some "supernatural" reason that Mikey couldn't sleep.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
2:00 A.M.   
  
Michael turned over to look at the clock. He couldn't sleep. He just couldn't. He was worried.  
Worried about what might happen if this little fight between him and Julia goes a little too far. Okay, it has gone over a little too far, but will it turn into a war.  
  
_Why am I losing sleep over this!_ Michael thought, seeing the clock turn 2:01._I don't care what goes on! Especially with her!_  
  
He rolled over, trying to get words out of his head.  
  
"Another time Mandark, Another time."  
  
_**In this textured imperssion, already the voice desired a song if to go far away.   
To follow generations of complete origin, the first memory of it teaches winds to dance a flower petal's dance.**_  
  
_Man! I'm going to be beat for Jazz Band! _Julia thought, writing on her computer. She looked at her clock._2:02, man it's getting late!_Julia yawned and stretched. "Oh well, the fan fic can wait for tomorrow," She said as she closed the computer.  
  
Julia got back in her covers. She couldn't believe what happened tonight. _The fights are going too far! Someone could have gotten hurt! Are Mandark and I going too far?_ She thought, turning in her bed.   
The clock struck 2:03 and both sides still didn't fall asleep.  
  
_**The journey towards south grips the Radio from the washed away Love Ballad  
The crying ear for such overflowed love, reputation in the tuft derived the murder of your Voice.**_  
  
2:20  
  
_Still no sleep?! Damn it! What's wrong with me?! _Michael asked himself, rubbing his hand in his hair.   
_I never cared about anything before! And now I care about what's happening to these fights we've been having. They have to stop, but why should I care?_  
Julia wrote the same thing in her journal just as Michael finished his thought. She continued, as his thought did.  
_Do I love him/her?_  
  
_**Looking Back On All We Had  
And I Want Your Love Again  
It All Seems So Faraway  
But I'll Have You In The End  
Looking Back On You And Me  
Now I Want Your Love Again  
Yes I'll Have You In The End**_  
  
"Naaa!" They both said out loud, shaking their heads.  
What they both need was sleep, not think wither or not the one loved the other. _But could we?_  
  
_**Cuz I Want Your Love Want Your Love Again**_  
  
2:30  
  
Julia bit down on her pen. She was going no where journalizing. She needs sleep. She wasn't getting it. She was scared. Scared cause one her room always creept her out, and two the fight. Will they stop? Will they ever stop? They need to; they can't go on like this. They need to..  
_Talk. We need to talk._ Michael though has he saw the clock turn 2:31. Sleep was really needed.  
Jazz band was tomorrow morning, and he knows she'll be there. She's always there.  
Maybe then,  
_We can talk._ Julia finished writing before putting up her journal.  
  
_**That time exceeded recently unto return.  
The steak entirely good in only one second,   
Won't You Please Hold Me**_  
  
6:45 A.M.  
  
Julia looked around the band room. She was tried. She finally went to asleep at 3:00, despite what was on her mind.  
_Where is he?_ She thought.  
  
Just then he stepped into the room. And suddenly, she felt a sense that this has happened before. But it wasn't about fighting, it was about something else. Something entirely different, but she couldn't put her finger on it.  
  
_**Frozen disaster limits**_  
  
Michael went up to Julia, feeling like he had done this before. It was weird.  
"Listen," they began, "We need to talk."  
  
They looked at each other blankly.  
_How did he/she know I was going to talk to him/her?  
  
**the heat of feelings.**_  
  
"I was thinking last night," they both began, "This fight is getting, well, out of hand."  
  
_**Confusion disaster limits **_  
  
"We need to stop fighting for a while, okay," They both finished at the same time.  
  
_**Charishing.**  
  
He lost sleep over this? This is new! He actually cares about something!  
  
**Looking Back On All We Had  
And I Want Your Love Again**  
  
Why am I not surprise that she did lose sleep?  
  
**It All Seems So Far Away  
But I'll Have You In The End**_  
  
"Listen, Julia, I was wondering, if we could meet about this sometime?" Michael asks, sticking out his hand.  
  
_**Looking Back On You And Me  
Now I Want Your Love Again**_  
  
Julia looked at him puzzled. But she smiled and gave a giggle.  
  
_**Yes I'll Have You In The End  
Cuz I Need Your Love Want Your Love Again**_  
  
"Michael Jacobs, playing peace marker. I never thought I see that!" Julia exclaimed sarcastically.  
Michael looked down, shaking his head, grinning.  
"But...I accept!" She said, shaking his hand firmly.  
  
_**Come of time exceeded to freeze; not to speak with this.  
Your memory, completely dreadful, since vainshed because**_  
  
Michael's grin quickly changed to a smile; he was happy that this was going to work out after all.   
_WAIT! WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING SMILING ABOUT THIS?!_  
Michael thought.   
  
_**Dear Me! Even with need, you wither tears.**_  
  
"Where do we meet and when?" Julia asked, letting go of the handshake.  
Michael started to give some thought to this.  
"How about, tomorrow after school?"   
  
"Sounds good!" She said smiling, but then she got her weird, oh-by-the-way-grin.  
  
"No fighting till we straightening things out?" She proposed, holding out her hand.  
  
"Now, your playing peace marker! Okay, I accept." Michael said, shaking her hand.  
  
_**That time exceeded recently unto return.  
The steak entirely good in only one second,**_  
  
They let go of each other's hands. A truce happened. They smiled at each other as they saw that they where making steps towards peace.  
  
_Maybe_ they thought _Maybe we'll finally end this._   
  
They then shook their heads. "Naa..." each said.   
  
Then they looked at each other again.  
_Could it? Maybe there is hope.  
  
**Won't You Please Hold Me**_  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
End of Chapter 5! Coming up: Chapter 6: Ultimatum: The Return of Fluffy! Looks like something happening to our would-be fighters. ^_^ Love is the air(Maybe because of Noko and Nako.. well, actually yes, and you'll see what happens in chapter 7.). However, the real Michael Jacobs isn't like this. But since this is my story, I can do what I want to him! :D But I'm starting to wish that the fan fic!Mikey will come over and kill Real!Mikey and take Real!Mikey's place, Fan fic!Mikey is nicer...  
  
That's wishful thinking! But it looks like something is beginning to stir between them? Think they'll get together in the end like their past lives? Or will they kill everyone, even themselves, in this useless band war?! OR WILL THEY GET DRUNK AND BECOME FRIENDS AGAIN BUT THEN HIT A TREE?! OR WILL THEY GET DRUNK AND ACCIDENTILY MARRY EACH OTHER?! OR WILL THEY GET DRUNK, PASS OUT ON THE LOW BRASS ROOM'S FLOOR AND BE CEMENTED TO IT FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFES?! or will they just get drunk and sing.  
Please tell me in your reviews! It will effect the chapters ahead, and mainly the final chapter, which by the looks of it, is not a long way off. Maybe 8 more chapters. I'm really enjoying writing this!   



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